這兩個月來我真的是個不折不扣的slacker.
The story has to go back to this march. On my birthday, I received a big boutique of pink roses from my present boy friend while also got a break-up from my ex.I was pretty sad about the break-up, so I started dating my boy friend because i wouldn’t have time to think about the ex this way.
However, things got out of control. I get used to his calls and company. Then, we became a couple. We went almost every hot spots in the city. Besides 東區(微風廣場,sogo,國父紀念館,誠品,安和路,統領百貨,環亞,brass monkey...),公館(他朋友的店,夜市,師大夜市),信義計畫區(華納威秀)where most people kill time at, we also went to 淡水/八里老街,新店(看夜景),南勢角(夜景),永和(二輪電影,樂華業市),林口附近的海邊,西門町(玩遊戲在萬年大樓,吃飯),故宮,天母,大安森林公園(散步),台北車站(吃東西,看書喝咖啡,補習),貓空...
We spent so much money on dining,snacks,drinks and parking.
Before the end of April, although I went out with him on fridays, saturdays and sundays, I could still do my things. Around May, I became afraid of losing him and I couldn’t fully concentrate on my own things.I stopped reading the ny times frequently (I demanded myself to read one every day to foster my critical thinking) and doing a lot of things for studying aboard.
Since that time, I have totally lost myself.
Now, we are more calm and each of us kind of let go a little bit. It’s hard to get used to being alone again.A lot of times I know I should go out and do things, but I just don’t have the strength. I am sort of down and can’t really hold myself together. I am being confused and I can’t find a way out.
Very soon, I am going to be in an absolute lonliness state. I will have no friends and family around me, not to mention a boyfriend. I will need to get adapt to a new environment and culture all by myself.
To be honest, I am really terrified. Everything(friends,new environment,american culture again and school) is so uncertain. But, since I made my choice long time ago,I need to take it and face it.If things went really terrible, I would make an alternative plan.Just try my decision first.
{image from:
http://www.flickr.com/photos/fulminiesaette/51655585/}
