Bullshit is a dog of mine. I have been keeping her for years. It was in a cold winter night when Bullshit first came at my door. t was also that night my ex-girlfriend told me she's going to leave me. When I put down the phone, I saw Bullshit swinging her tail at me. What a coincidence! But that's how our friendship began.
I call her Bullshit because she shits a lot. Further, the shits she makes look like bull's shits, and smell like them too. I guess she's not so proud of the name I gave her. You can tell by the unpleasant bowwow sounds she made when you call her. Soon enough, Bullshit takes over my ex-girlfriend's place and occupies most of the leisure time I have. Most people have a really hard time ending a relationship, but not me with my lovely Bullshit. Everyday, I am happy as hell.
However, for some strange reasons, my doctor has always been trying to convince me that there is no such a dog. From time to time, he tells me that it is nothing more but my own paranoiac illusion. But I know what he is up to, and I am not going to fall for that. He is just being jealous. It always happens when you have got something wonderful, and people cannot take that something away from you so they devalued what you have got.
There is no way you can find a better dog like Bullshit.
And I proved my point today! When I was trying to explain my concept to the manager this morning at work, he suddenly interrupted me and burst out the name of my dog.
"Bullshit!!" he shouted.
"I am sorry. I err…" I was panic.
I understand the company policy that no pets are allowed in the office. Usually I hide Bullshit under my table. I must have been her long tail.
"Oh, can you see it?" with surprise, I asked.
"Of course I can see it! That's Bullshit!!" the manager shouted.
He was so pissed that he smashed my file holder and walked away. I know I am in big trouble. But that is not the point. The point is how can someone else see her if Bullshit is only an imaginary creature of my own mind? The doctor was so wrong. Don't try to convince me that it was just a coincidence that the manager happened to mention the word "Bullshit". I know what's in your mind. Jealousy, it happens all the time.
文章定位：
