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Ludwig Van Beethoven

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連貝多芬都想告訴你/ 蕭閎仁


 

我的抽屜 沾滿灰塵 有多久沒整理
濃濃哀傷在嘆息

我拿起了筆

寫了古典第一樂章

我想告訴你
我快要聽不清楚
非得要像休止符 黑不拉幾
要斷斷續續

連貝多芬 也都愛上你
你說分開最美麗
! 我還想樂章在繼續
愛來愛去 愛不過是病

 

連貝多芬 都想告訴你
耳聾了 更有意義
也許你只是下雨下在我的青草地
等放晴了 就自然蒸發

 


 

電腦修好打開他的第一件事情

就是 RE-VIEW你

馬上抓貝多芬的歌

然後開始整合屬於你的,我的,我們的感性

點,線,面,

點點滴滴,斷斷續續,

斷點,片段,面象,

 

 

在電影版"Sex and the City慾望城市

Carrie躺在Mr Big旁讀的貝多芬情詩

 

是節錄自Ludwig Van Beethoven (貝多芬) ,

貝多芬去世後在他抽屜裡找的三封情書其中一篇。

 

書信上沒有提到收信人的名字,

只用" Immortal Beloved永恆的愛人"

還有拍成電影,叫"Immortal Beloved 不朽真情"

 

 

 

My thoughts go out to you, my Immortal Beloved

 I can live only wholly with you or not at all
Be Calm—love me---today—yesterday—
Only calm consideration of our existence
can we achieve our purpose to live together.
what tearful longings for you—
you—you-my life—my all—farewell.
Oh continue to love me—
Never misjudge the most faithful heart of your beloved.
Ever thine, ever mine, ever ours. 

  
                                                                     ----Beethoven

 

請靜下心來心如止水地只愛我一個人吧
無論現在或過去
我的渴望化作淚水決堤也只為了你一人

----只有你--只有為你

你就是我生命的重心 我所需的全部
為了你我可以放下所一有切

因為你就是我所需要的全部
請繼續地愛著我吧

永遠不要輕忽了你心愛的我

我這個最忠貞不變愛你的心
始終

永遠屬於你的

永遠屬於我的

永遠屬於彼此的

                                                            

                                                                            -----貝多芬


雖然Mr. Big搞砸了夢幻婚禮

但是兩顆真摯的心

最終還是會緊緊相繫

 

從來不寫情書,也不會寫情書的Mr. Big

"情書大全" 

一篇篇mailCarrie

就是最後那一句

" Ever thine  Ever mine  Ever ours "

"永遠屬於你的 永遠屬於我的 永遠屬於彼此的"

化解了二人的隔閡

再次投入彼此的懷抱   

牽手走向紅毯

雖然最後是最簡單的白色洋裝

最低調的市公所

最簡單的婚禮

最少的觀禮人數

卻是最接近幸福的彼此

 

 

在論及婚嫁時

常常會有很多紛爭,矛盾,掙扎

能安然度過的就是走向紅毯的另一端

and then the Prince and the Princess live happily ever after;

不行的   

就只能一拍兩散

可惜這場情深緣淺了

 

 

Mr. Big之所以逃離婚禮有他的苦衷

畢竟經歷失敗的2次婚姻

要再次走入禮堂

再次承諾對方的未來

真的是不容易

這需要時間  

需要兩人的溝通諒解

他沒有錯

Carrie也反省到自己當時在雜誌專訪時

只顧及自己夢幻婚禮的張羅跟公主的新娘禮服

只以"我"為主詞的長篇大論

沒有"你",沒有"我們"!

也難怪Mr. Big會感覺沒有be counted

in her mind, or in her ideal wedding.

 

 

 

再次面對愛情,

那種情竇初開的悸動,

我也會畏懼自己會不會再搞砸,

也會悸動到一股壓抑不了的緊張,

是因為在乎

所以才會患得患失吧!

 

每天都需要給自己加油鼓勵

to love someone seriously, but take it easy during the stage.

to love someone greatly, but take it plain during the phase.

我才長大發現

喜歡一個人時,其實不會牢牢地掛在嘴邊每天提醒

愛上一個人時,或許會想緊緊地摟在懷裡佔為己有

但是深愛一個人時,只會讓思念靜靜地在心裡蔓延

那是你的內斂

這是我的溫柔

是我的課題

是你的成熟

Love silently creeps along the days

with time regularly passing

 

 

我讀了書上的證明,然後下的心得

不要自滿,自以為自己有多麼瞭解對方,多麼瞭解愛情

唯有永遠的好奇跟追求,才能維持愛情的熱情和新鮮感,

然後才會長久.

 

你說過:現在就算我們很好

         但是如果五年後,我們還是像現在一樣

         我們就不會互相喜歡對方了吧!

 

現在我懂了

原來之前盲目追求的是超現實的fairy tale,和一句happily ever after罷了

一段關係的完美終點不是婚禮,

愛情不是墳墓,

不是離開現實社會的防空洞,避風港

愛是挑戰市場的後盾,戰鬥力的能源

是因為擁有愛,所以我們才有辦法生存

我是你打仗的意義

你是我學習自衛的分擔目的

我是你保護的人民

你是我被愛的堡壘

We are not fighting against an enemy of anyone else, but for Our Love

We are not advancing to a happy ending, but a Happy Start

in my secret garden

in your Kingdom

in our territory

 

 

 

 

Happiness deoes not only lie in Love,

but also within Trust 

幸福不只是在於愛,

幸福更是建立在彼此的信任

不是外界的眼光,

不需要規則的完美認同

只需要例外的衷心祝福

 

對我現在而言, 

愛情裡最美的結局--

不是浪漫婚禮

是永遠屬於你的

          屬於我的

          屬於我們的彼此

         屬於愛的回憶

愛情裡最美的語言

不是"我愛你"

其實是"我信任你"

 

 

我相信這最好的安排

一切盡在不言中

不用問

我懂

1個問題

1份勇氣

10秒鐘

10個月份

10個滿分

11次見面

11個驚喜

101下的願望

1001夜的故事晚安

 

 

 

3/30

4/06

5/03

6/13

6/14

6/21

7/05

7/12

8/23

8/28

8/30

 

 

 


 

 

The First Letter

July 6, in the morning

 

My angel, my all, my very self –

Only a few words today and at that with pencil (with yours) –

Not till tomorrow will my lodgings be definitely determined upon –

what a useless waste of time –

Why this deep sorrow when necessity speaks –

can our love endure except through sacrifices,

through not demanding everything from one another;

can you change the fact that you are not wholly mine,

I am not wholly thine

Oh God,

look out into the beauties of nature

and comfort your heart with that which must be -

Love demands everything and that very justly –

thus it is to me with you, and to your with me.

But you forget so easily that I must live for me and for you;

if we were wholly united

you would feel the pain of it as little as I –

My journey was a fearful one;

I did not reach here until 4 o'clock yesterday morning.

Lacking horses the post-coach chose another route,

but what an awful one;

at the stage before the last I was warned not to travel at night;

I was made fearful of a forest,

but that only made me the more eager –

and I was wrong.

The coach must needs break down on the wretched road,

a bottomless mud road.

Without such positions as I had with me

I should have remained stuck in the road.

Esterhazy, traveling the usual road here,

had the same fate with eight horses

that I had with four –

Yet I got some pleasure out of it,

as I always do when I successfully overcome difficulties –

Now a quick change to things internal from things external.

We shall surely see each other soon;

Moreover,

Today

I cannot share with you the thoughts I have had

during these last few days touching my own life –

If our hearts were always close together,

I would have none of these.

My heart is full of so many things to say to you - ah –

There are moments when I feel that speech amounts to nothing at all –

Cheer up - remain my true, my only treasure, my all as I am yours.

The gods must send us the rest, what for us must and shall be -


Your faithful LUDWIG.



 

The Second Letter

 

Evening, Monday, July 6

 

You are suffering, my dearest creature –

only now have I learned that

letters must be posted very early in the morning on Mondays to Thursdays –

the only days on which the mail-coach goes from here to K. –

You are suffering - Ah, wherever I am, there you are also

I will arrange it with you and me that I can live with you.

What a life!!! thus!!! without you –

pursued by the goodness of mankind hither and thither –

which I as little want to deserve as I deserve it –

Humility of man towards man - it pains me –

and when I consider myself in relation to the universe,

what am I and what is He - whom we call the greatest - and yet –

herein lies the divine in man –

I weep

when I reflect that you will probably not receive the first report from me

until Saturday –

Much as you love me - I love you more –

But do not ever conceal yourself from me –

Good night -

As I am taking the baths I must go to bed –

Oh God - so near! so far!

Is not our love truly a heavenly structure,

and also as firm as the vault of heaven?

 


 

The Third Letter

 

Good morning, on July 7


 

Though still in bed, my thoughts go out to you, my Immortal Beloved,

now and then joyfully, then sadly,

waiting to learn whether or not fate will hear us –

I can live only wholly with you or not at all –

Yes, I am resolved to wander so long away from you

until I can fly to your arms and say that I am really at home with you,

and can send my soul enwrapped in you into the land of spirits –

Yes, unhappily it must be so –

You will be the more contained since you know my fidelity to you.

No one else can ever possess my heart –

never - never -

Oh God, why must one be parted from one whom one so loves.

And yet my life in V is now a wretched life –

Your love makes me at once the happiest and the unhappiest of men –

At my age I need a steady, quiet life -

can that be so in our connection?

My angel,

I have just been told that the mailcoach goes every day –

therefore

I must close at once so that you may receive the letter at once –

Be calm,

only by a calm consideration of our existence

can we achieve our purpose to live together –

Be calm - love me - today - yesterday –

what tearful longings for you –

you - you - my life - my all - farewell.

Oh continue to love me –

Never misjudge the most faithful heart of your beloved.
Ever thine
Ever mine
Ever ours

 

Ludwig van Beethoven

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

台長: CoCo Chanel
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