Nobody will believe that sleeping for me is an enormous pressure.
I can't fall asleep easily.
Even I am tired to death.
In addition to working and studying, I have to excercise an hour everyday.
Logically, I should be the one who doesn't have sleeping problem.
Unfortunately, I am ..............
I have to take my sleeping process into two apart.
sleeping for 4 hours; weaking up for three hours and going back to bed for another hour.
I have nothing to complain if I can be able to make myself energetic in this way.
However, it doesn't happen.
I dream a lot.....
Dreams don't bother me.
Anyway, I like to analyze them.
The thing bothering me most is that I don't feel that I fall asleep at all.
I need power and energy to face everyday's frustration....................
I do not complain it.
I just can't overcome it............................................
Unsufficent sleeping makes me depressed a lot.
It comes from nowhere; it's a feeling of depression, frustration,unknown disappointed and being abandant by the whole world.
No specific subject, issue.......................................
but feeling sad...........
I don't like the way I am.......
alas......people just don't know what contend is.
when I am not depressed enough, I would blame myself that I become stupid.
When I feel depressed, it also makes me hopeless.
Even it is not funny for life, but I have to admit that I really can feel that I become smarter today............................
delimma.......delimma........
imblance is a curse for me and it follows me all the time.
Overcoming it is still an unresolve problem for me.
Perhaps it takes my lifetime to go through this................
This is true that there is no happy wrods in the diary.....................
Now, I have to confess........maybe I really need someone to trust and lean on.....................................
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