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重色輕友

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『重色輕友』是你常對我說的言語,也是我們互說對方的話語
                                                                               
                                                                               
2009年7月25日
                                                                               
那天是我家閃光要比賽中提琴的日子
                                                                               
每天陪她練琴、陪她去配伴奏、陪她去上課
                                                                               
前一天還特地買了一件漂亮的小禮服給她
                                                                               
準備讓她漂漂亮亮的上台演出
                                                                               
鼓勵她要拿到名次,再送一件給她
                                                                               
一直期待看她那天漂亮的演出


 但是,一大早接到你撥來的電話
                                                                               
心想,什麼風吹到你,讓你會想在早上找我?
                                                                               
接起電話,裡頭的聲音不是你,一個哭泣的聲音
                                                                               
告訴著我,你出車禍,希望我過去看你,但不勉強
                                                                               
詢問之下,才知道電話中是你姊
                                                                               
掛掉電話,一直難以相信這個事實
                                                                               
卻又逼著自己相信,因為你家人不會無聊拿你的生命開玩笑啊!

                                                                                                                                                            
我以為你不會太糟糕,所以擬訂計畫隔日上台中探望你
                                                                               
順便去大甲拜拜,幫你祈福一下
                                                                               
沒想到,是我疏忽了,你不是那麼的幸運者
                                                                               
直到下午接到噩耗通知時,我才手忙腳亂的出門趕車上去

外面下著大雨,我的心也跟著心急,多希望我可以開車飆上去
                                                                               
                                                                               
原本計畫好的一切,還妄想著看完閃光的演出後再去探望你
                                                                               
沒想到你卻用你的生命來告訴我『重色輕友』
                                                                               
逼不得已讓我放下閃光的比賽,趕緊上去看你,只希望你別再生氣
                                                                               
至少讓你知道,我還不至於在這關鍵時間『重色輕友』
                                                                               
                                                                               
你說,是不是你故意看看我到底會不會『重色輕友』呢?
                                                                               
那麼,你看到了嗎?
                                                                               
我沒有『重色輕友』啊!
                                                                               
我即時的趕去看你了,代表我還很重視你的
                                                                               
但是,是你高興我有趕去要探望你,所以沒有了遺憾嗎?

否則,你為什麼要在我還在路途中,選擇了先行離去?
                                                                               
可以告訴我為什麼嗎?
                                                                               
如果你希望我去看你,為何不在多等我幾分鐘?
                                                                               
兩天你都等了,難道有差那麼幾分鐘嗎?
                                                                               
                                                                               
2009年7月25日 下午3點多
                                                                               
電話再度響起,你送進去急救中,我還在車上,連彰化都還不到
                                                                               
20分鐘後
                                                                               
電話又響了,急忙接起詢問急救狀況,你宣告不治
                                                                               
你姊要我不需要上去了,我說我還是上去看看吧!
                                                                               
最後一路奔波,雖沒見到你家人,但有見到你


2009年7月25日 下午4點41分
                                                                               
我抵達台中,閃光也準備開始比賽
                                                                               
我努力去找尋你,她努力達到我的期許
                                                                               
見到你最後一面時,我輕輕的流下幾滴淚水
                                                                               
請友人送我到東海別墅那邊等待家人來接我
                                                                               
打了電話給閃光,問問她比賽結果如何?
                                                                               
她完成了我的期許
                                                                               
而我也完成了最後的努力
                                                                               
但是,我想在電話中痛哭,卻保持鎮定的告訴她,你離開的消息
                                                                               
                                                                               
獨自徘徊在我和你一起來過的東海別墅

最終找個地方坐著發呆回憶,不斷的哭又停 停又哭
                                                                               
你有聽到、看到我的難過嗎?
                                                                               
台中有我們一些回憶、台南亦是如此、雲林更不必說了
                                                                               
似乎走到哪,都能讓我想起我們的時光,怎能說放就放?

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